Boundaries and Intimacy
This image encapsulates a really important lesson that many of us struggle to learn. If we want intimacy then we have to risk the vulnerability of authenticity, of being really honest. Among other things, being authentic means saying what is and isn't OK for you. That's what us therapist types mean when we talk about "setting boundaries" The right-hand column in this picture is a good summary of what happens if we don't do this. If we are not looking after ourselves by setting good boundaries we are likely to end up resentful and lonely. So why is it so difficult for many of us to set boundaries? Typically it is because (perhaps unconsciously) we don't believe we are good enough, important enough, loveable enough or safe enough to get…