29Jul 2020 by Nic Beets No Comments
What is “couple time” for?

What is “couple time” for?

blogs
MAKING TIME FOR COUPLE TIME IS A GOOD IDEA Like a business or a garden or a vintage car, relationships need constant maintenance; frequent and consistent attending to. If you are not attending to your relationship by investing time and effort in it, you can't expect it to work well. Lots of people have got a handle on the notion that it’s important to schedule couple time into their busy lives.  Which is great.  If you’re a busy person and something is important to you, it needs to be in your diary. But we often find that couples don't talk about what the time is FOR. It can be useful to think about three key categories of communication that couples need to put time into: 1. PRAGMATICS AND LOGISTICS Coordinating…
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29May 2020 by Nic Beets No Comments
Getting to resolution: In praise of persistence, persuasion & openness

Getting to resolution: In praise of persistence, persuasion & openness

blogs, Communication, Intimacy, Relationships
For many of us, it’s hard to know what we want, let alone express it to our life partner.  If we are brave enough to actually tell our partner our preference/desire/fantasy, it can feel crushing when this is not met with immediate and enthusiastic acceptance. Yet, the truth is we are always attracted to someone who is different from us.  An inevitable result is that our partner will see things differently, will have different preferences, and organise their priorities in ways that are alien to us. This creates conflict.  It doesn’t mean there is anything going wrong. This is where we need to be persistent.  To hold on to what we think, want, or feel and keep treating it as important and worthwhile.  Yet, just to make the business of…
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